The Truth Behind The Mutants
by DarkJadedRose
Summary: Why is Xavier really in a wheelchair? What's Logan's biggest secret? What does Scott really do when he says he's studying? Here is the truth of our favorite and not so favorite characters.
1. Xaviers Wheechair

Hi Everyone! I know you're all probably tired of my constant writing but my brother gave me a great idea for a new humor fic. Hope ya like it. Here is the Truth behind the Mutants. I don't own anything; the song is by Bob Seger 'Old Time Rock & Roll'. Many will be OOC, but it's all in good fun. **************************************************************************** * *The Office*  
  
Professor Xavier sat on his wheelchair and stared out the window, his hands held together as always. He thought about all the mutants he had recruited and how he had managed to recruit them. He smiled slightly and watched as the clouds shifted to new figures. At the knock on the door he turned a solemn look on his face.  
  
"Hey Professor, Ororo and me are takin' the kids out to the movies."  
  
"I believe that is a good idea Logan." Logan nodded and left. Five minutes later the Professor scanned the mansion and found that they had all left and Hank was in the med lab perfecting an antidote for Rogue. He smiled evilly and than the picture fades to black.  
  
*The Rec Room*  
  
Suddenly a bald man slid into the room wearing a button down shirt, a pair of underwear and white socks. The music blasted.  
  
Just take those old records off the shelf  
  
I'll sit and listen to 'em by myself  
  
Today's music ain't got the same soul  
  
I like that old time rock 'n' roll  
  
The Professor began to shake and shimmy. He laughed gleefully at the rarely obtainable moments of not having to use that stupid wheelchair. He only needed it to recruit the mutants.  
  
Don't try to take me to a disco  
  
You'll never even get me out on the floor  
  
In ten minutes I'll be late for the door  
  
I like that old time rock 'n' roll  
  
  
  
Most of the time the recruits never wanted to come with him; take Scott for instance. He had wheeled up to him while he sat in his little chair at the orphanage. The Professor asked him to come with him but Scott said no. So what did the Professor do? He started to tell him about how he had been attacked by a killer squirrel and how it chewed up his legs so that he couldn't walk anymore, he even offered to show him but of course the little boy refused, ha ha! But that had gotten Scott to be his first lackey!  
  
Still like that old time rock 'n' roll  
  
That kind of music just soothes the soul  
  
I reminisce about the days of old  
  
With that old time rock 'n' roll  
  
Xavier started to thrust his hips forward as he moved side to side remembering how he had gotten Jean to come. She hadn't wanted to leave her parents behind so Xavier used his trusty wheelchair to draw the girl in. He remembered how he had explained to her that as a young mutant he was skipping across the road, minding his own business as he licked his large Lollypop. A giant bull had come after him; he had run as fast as his little legs could carry him to no avail. That was when it stomped on his legs leaving them meatless. Jean had cried and told her parents she wanted to help Xavier and his school. Lackey number two!  
  
Won't go to hear them play a tango  
  
I'd rather hear some blues or funky old soul  
  
There's only sure way to get me to go  
  
Start playing old time rock 'n' roll  
  
Xavier began to do the worm when he thought of how he had gotten Kitty to join them. What no one knew was that he had visited Kitty before she had decided to agree with Jean and joined the institute. This was before Lance had tried to kill her. He had told her about how he had fallen in love with a woman who had betrayed him with an ex lover. When he had tried to win her heart she had poured hot oil on his legs and lit it on fire, allowing it to shrivel up to nothing but bone. The romantic tale won him her heart. Yipee!  
  
Call me a relic, call me what you will  
  
Say I'm old-fashioned; say I'm over the hill  
  
Today's music ain't got the same soul  
  
I like that old time rock 'n' roll  
  
Last but not least he decided to contemplate Wolverine. Ha ha! Everyone wondered why Logan stayed on with him when he obviously didn't want to but Xavier had threatened to share his secret to everyone, a secret so disturbing that he never wanted anyone to know. Xavier did a split as the grand finally to his favorite song came.   
  
Still like that old time rock 'n' roll  
  
That kind of music just soothes the soul  
  
I reminisce about the days of old  
  
With that old time rock 'n' roll  
  
*Xavier's Office*  
  
Professor Xavier sat on his wheelchair and stared out the window, his hands held together as always. Logan knocked and than entered the room the rest of the mutants following him in.  
  
"Like, hi Professor, we wished you could have come," Kitty said, touching his shoulder in a daughterly way. Each recruit stared after him with love in their eyes, he was a self-sacrificial man who suffered and prevailed. Xavier smiled lovingly and deep down in his heart, he knew he was the smartest Mo Fo to ever walk the earth.  
  
**************************************************************************** **  
  
Next Chapter: Wolverine's Secret! Read and Review people. 


	2. Logans Secret Behind closed doors

Hello Everyone. I own nothing; I will give the credits in the end so as not to spoil the fic. Remember, everyone is OOC. So now for the next chapter! ************************************************************************  
The kids left Xavier's office and went to their rooms, it was only six o'clock. They followed Wolverine to his bedroom, he growled at them and they scattered before he opened the door to his bedroom. He entered the dark place and flicked on the switch.  
  
He took off his tight black jeans and muscle shirt, after pulling off his boots. Around his naked body he wrapped a bathrobe. He decided to take a shower; conveniently it was built within his large bedroom, in a small bathroom. He opened the top of his stereo system to make sure that his favorite C.d. was in, he pressed play.  
  
Logan stopped at the mirror and looked at his reflection. He smiled softly touching the lilac fluffiness of his bathrobe. Celine Dion soon filled the room.  
  
Every night in my dreams  
  
I see you, I feel you,  
  
That is how I know you go on  
  
He walked over to his My Little Pony collection and pulled out his favorite one, the one with the hearts that smell.  
  
"You thmel tho nithe." He lisped. He put the doll back and went to sit on his bed and massage his pedicured toes.  
  
Far across the distance  
  
And spaces between us  
  
You have come to show you go on  
  
"Oh geeth my feet hurt." He rubbed his hands on the cream colored satin sheets and wondered if he should indulge on those Victorian lace curtains he had seen in the JC Penny catalog. He heard a bark in the corner and laughed as his French poodle 'Pinky' licked his face.  
  
"You're thuch a thweet thang." He said.  
  
Near, far, wherever you are  
  
I believe that the heart does go on  
  
Once more you open the door  
  
And you're here in my heart  
  
And my heart will go on and on  
  
He put Pinky down and went to the bathroom to take a shower, he decided to soothe his nerves and lit some of the candles in his collection, the room filled with the scent of Vanilla and Jasmine.  
  
Love can touch us one time  
  
And last for a lifetime  
  
And never let go till we're one  
  
"I should wash my hair, I hate it when it getsth all limp like thith." He took out his favorite bottle of Herbal Essence and began to rub his scalp, he felt alive and invigorated. Who needed a woman when he could have Clairol any day?  
  
Love was when I loved you  
  
One true time I hold to  
  
In my life we'll always go on  
  
A knock on the door caused Logan to panic.  
  
"Hold on," he growled. Pinky began to whimper, quietly Logan told her that it was okay, that he was still her Logey Bogey!  
  
Near, far, wherever you are  
  
I believe that the heart does go on  
  
Once more you open the door  
  
And you're here in my heart  
  
And my heart will go on and on  
  
He blew out the candles and pressed the pause button on the c.d. player, opening the door wearing nothing but a white towel he looked at Scott.  
  
"What'dya want kid?" Scott looked about nervously.  
  
"I just wanted to ask if you can take over D.R. session today, I have a math test to study for and I'll be cramming all night, don't let anyone disturb me." Logan grunted in agreement and closed the door.  
  
"That wath a clothe call Pinky." He went to dry off and realized that he was about to miss Sex and the City.  
  
"Oh Pooh!"  
  
You're here, there's nothing I fear,  
  
And I know that my heart will go on  
  
We'll stay forever this way  
  
You are safe in my heart  
  
And my heart will go on and on  
  
***  
  
"Hey Scott, you wanna go out tonight?" Jean smiled before he entered the door. Scott gulped.  
  
"No-Not tonight Jean, I gotta test tomorrow, sorry bye." He slammed the door and it shut.  
  
***********************************************************************  
  
I don't own My Little Pony, or Clairol, or herbal essence, or My heart will go on by Celine Dion, JC Penny, Pinky or sex and the city and everything else u know about already. Hope ya liked it. The songs aren't suppose to make sense, just support the point. And don't flame my lisp, I put it that way on purpose :) I hope no one gets offended. Next Chapter is Scott!  
  
Review Please. 


	3. Scott pays for his car how?

I don't own anything only the booty grabbing and old perverts. The credits will go in the bottom, hope ya will enjoy. And yes, Rogue is underway, but I won't tell you what the truth is behind her until we get there. This isn't as funny as I wish it could be, but oh well. I hope u still read, review and continue reading, oh yeah and u can review every single chapter, I love it. ***********************************************************************  
  
Scott slid against the door. He did as he always did and blocked any kind of scanning through his mind, by putting his mental shields down. He looked at his math book, opened and ready to read. He gave an evil grin and went to his closet instead and changed.  
  
Opening the window in his new outfit he climbed down the tree and went to the bus stop on his way to work. He arrived just in time; he slipped in through the back door.  
  
"Come on ya'll, it's time to go," his manager said. It was Scott's turn now. His palms were sweaty, he adjusted his red shades. This was his life long dream he was living. He marched out there, the curtains opened and the music began to play.  
  
***  
  
Body...wanna feel my body? Body...such a thrill my body  
  
Body...wanna touch my body?  
  
Body...it's too much my body Check it out my body, body.  
  
Don't you doubt my body, body.  
  
talkin' bout my body, body,  
  
check it out my body  
  
The screams began, the women grew wild! Scott was shaking his hips and flexing his chest muscles. Scott was wearing a leather vest and tight leather pants. He had on fingerless gloves and motorcycle boots. A biker hat completed his look as well as a tooth pick and chain.  
  
He began to slowly take off his vest while allowing his hips to swirl; he threw it at one woman who screamed and held it to her nose, than he walked over to a table and began to thrust his hips forward. A woman had a cardiac arrest. He almost grew worried but remembered that this was retirement night, these things were expected when senior citizens were about.  
  
Every man wants to be a macho macho man  
  
to have the kind of body, always in demand  
  
Jogging in the mornings, go man go  
  
works out in the health spa, muscles glow  
  
You can best believe that, he's a macho man  
  
ready to get down with, anyone he can  
  
Skinny, wrinkly fingers began to move up and down his slick body. He turned around and slowly began to take off his leather pants, the senior citizens yelled! He left it half unbuttoned.  
  
"Woo hoo! Take that off honey." One said. "Now that's a pair of cheeks I'd love to pinch," said another.  
  
Hey! Hey! Hey, hey, hey!  
  
Macho, macho man (macho man)  
  
I've got to be, a macho man  
  
Macho, macho man  
  
I've got to be a macho! Ow....  
  
Scott threw his hat out at the yelling crowd. Suddenly a blur appeared and an attractive woman stood before him, he blinked his eyes. The woman was pretty for being an old dame. She had smooth skin; he wondered what surgery she had used.  
  
Without thinking Scott went over to her and began to flex his biceps: he gave her a lap dance. Next he pulled off his pants in a sudden move and stood before the crowd, wearing nothing but a red glittery thong with the words 'suck this' written in the front.  
  
Macho, macho man  
  
I've got to be, a macho man  
  
Macho, macho man (yeah, yeah)  
  
I've got to be a macho!  
  
He shimmied his hips and allowed the old women's fingers to shove dollar bills down his underwear. He smiled (this should pay for the other half of his car) and smirked as they grabbed his naked booty. He went to the older woman that had called his attention and gave her more special attention, she spanked him like there was no tomorrow.  
  
Body, its so hot, my body,  
  
Body, love to pop my body,  
  
Body, love to please my body,  
  
Body, don't you tease my body,  
  
Body, you'll adore my body,  
  
Body, come explore my body,  
  
Body, made by God, my body,  
  
Body, it's so good, my body  
  
He flipped around and grinned as she slapped his butt. The woman's voice was slightly high pitched, but the more it spoke the more familiar it sounded.  
  
Hey! Hey! Hey, hey, hey!  
  
Macho, macho man  
  
I've got to be, a macho man  
  
Macho, macho man  
  
I've got to be a macho! (all right)  
  
He climbed back on the platform and threw his toothpick to the side, at the same time a bra was thrown at him; he caught it and saw how the front hung half way to his knees. He began to spin it with his finger like a sling shot and it flung it to the other side of the room.  
  
You can tell a macho, he has a funky walk  
  
his western shirts and leather, always look so boss  
  
Funky with his body, he's a king  
  
call him Mister Eagle, dig his chains  
  
You can best believe that, he's a macho man  
  
likes to be the leader, he never dresses grand  
  
Scott grabbed the chain on his neck and ripped it off; he began to rub it all over his chest.  
  
Macho, macho man (yeah, yeah)  
  
I've got to be, a macho man  
  
Macho, macho man  
  
I've got to be a macho! All Right!  
  
He twirled around and stopped, standing still.  
  
Ugh! Macho..baby!  
  
Body, body, body wanna feel my body,  
  
Body, body, body gonna thrill my body,  
  
Body, body, body don'tcha stop my body,  
  
Body, body, body it's so hot my body,  
  
He panted, still not moving; the crowd went wild, some voices shaking. The room was filled with beeps since their heart pacers were going out of whack. He did a flip and landed in a split on the floor.  
  
Every man ought to be a macho macho man,  
  
To live a life of freedom, machos make a stand,  
  
Have their own life style and ideals,  
  
Possess the strength and confidence, life's a steal,  
  
You can best believe that he's a macho man  
  
He's a special person in anybody's land.  
  
He stood up and than danced around as more and more money was being put into his underwear.  
  
"I wish that every night was retirement night," said one of his favorite clients Grace, she was ninety.  
  
"Did you get a new set of dentures Grace?" Grace fluttered her eye lashes.  
  
"Why yes Scottie, I just had them done last week." She smiled, her new teeth glittering in the fluorescent lighting.  
  
Hey! Hey! Hey, hey, hey!  
  
Macho, macho man (macho man)  
  
I've got to be, a macho man  
  
Macho, macho man  
  
I've got to be a macho! (Dig the hair on my chest)  
  
He ran his fingers through the gray hair on her head, she screamed and her oxygen tank had to be set higher by her home attendant.  
  
Macho, macho man (see my big thick mustache)  
  
I've got to be, a macho man  
  
Macho, macho man  
  
I've got to be a macho! (Dig broad shoulders)  
  
"Take it all off!" Said that special lady that kept catching his eye. Scott decided to appease her, for the first time, he was thread bare when he threw his undies at the screaming crowd. That special lady stood up and flung herself at him.  
  
Macho, macho man  
  
I've got to be, a macho man  
  
Macho, macho man  
  
I've got to be a macho! HEY!  
  
"OhyeahScottieboythisiswhati'vebeenwaitingforthepastfourmonths!" said the voice.  
  
"Pietro?!" Scott shouted. Pietro paled.  
  
"Uh-oh," he made a quick dash to the exit.  
  
************************************************************************  
  
I hope you like this chapter. Whose next? Is it not obvious? Our beloved speed demon! This chapter wasn't as great sigh.long song to. Anyway "Macho Man" belongs to the Village People.  
  
Review! 


	4. Pearls, peach lipstick, tweezers, oh my!...

Thanks to everyone for the reviews. We (me and my two brothers) appreciate it. I upped the rating. Thanks to Lyranfan for commenting on Scott's, um, undie status, and I'd like to ask the Rogue Witch to please e-mail me a link to the video, I tried and they wouldn't let me through and I really wanna see it. Anyway, on with the story.  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
Pietro was home in a second. No one had seen him; he quickly changed from his long pink, flowery dress with the laced hem, the beige knee high stockings and his grey wig to his normal clothes. He had almost been caught. He hoped that Scott wouldn't tell anyone. He didn't want his secret to be let out.  
  
He remembered the first time he had realized the truth about himself. He was thirteen and had begun to watch a show that changed his life. He had went out and bought a couple of dresses and some make up and even bought the gray wig that now abided in his bottom dresser drawer. He looked in the mirror and sighed. He longed to put the peach lipstick back on with the blue eye make up.  
  
He looked at his watch; it was already eleven thirty at night. He would have to hurry before the program started already. He ran over to the door and locked it. He took out his new favorite peach nail polish and began to paint his nails while singing along to the theme song.  
  
"Thank you for being a friend, traveled down the road and back again, your heart is true you're a pal and a confidant." He stared at his nails while singing along, and smiled. Luckily he had bought the nail polish that dried quickly. He pulled out a tweezer from his little pea green leather purse that matched his opened toed pumps, to perfect his eyebrows. "And if you threw a party, invited everyone you ever knew, you would see the biggest gift would be from me, and the card attached would say thank you for being a friend."  
  
He put on some anti aging cream and vitamin C under his eyes. A boy had to fight off the fine lines before they appeared. Tomorrow was bingo at the church, he wanted look his best.  
  
He plucked some stray hairs when the door was broken open by Lance.  
  
"Where the hell were you?" He asked gruffly. Pietro clutched his heart.  
  
"Well ah declare Lance, ya shouldn't bang the door open like that!" He patted his hair and commenced to dust non existent dirt off his clothing. Lance exited the room slowly and wondered how much Evan would pay for this info.  
  
***************  
  
Next up, our unfavoritist (by other obviously cruel Evan fics {lol}) X men/Morlock. Evan Daniels. Please review, feedback tastes good on hamburgers. Plus I sort of ripped this off from Saturday night live. So sue me! Okay don't. The song is by Andrew Gold. 


	5. Evan and the song Fame? i don't know

Okay ya'll don't kill me! I had to get it out of my system. It's pretty typical, in this one; Evan has been parodied so much it's hard to be original, lol. Well I hope you guys like it. **************************************************************************** * The Next morning:  
Evan looked in the mirror as he dressed and pulled on his sleeveless t-shirt, he picked up his skateboard and looked in his mirror once again. This isn't me, he thought. I don't say dude, I don't even care about skateboarding, he sighed heavily, I'm deeper than that. He looked at the envelope from the school he had applied to as a transfer.  
  
He reread the letter; it told him his audition was in a few days, Saturday to be exact. He would be there, alone, but he would make it.  
  
Saturday:  
  
Evan squeezed his fist together. He looked into the mirror and grinned. He ran his hands over his chest and smoothed down his shirt.  
  
"Evan Daniels?" A deep voice called out. He walked out to the stage. He looked at the small group of people before him. "Are you Evan?"  
  
"Yes sir," he looked confident, felt confident that this was right.  
  
"Well why do you want to attend our school?" Evan smiled; he was prepared for this question.  
  
"Because I live to dance!" With that the lights came on completely and his outfit shown. He threw his hands in the air. The pink, yellow and green glittery assemble added edge to his blonde hair. He closed his eyes and pursed his lips. You can do it Evan, he thought. The music played.  
  
***  
  
Baby look at me  
  
And tell me what you see  
  
You ain't seen the best of me yet  
  
Give me time I'll make you forget the rest  
  
Evan twirled around on his toes, and did a jump in the air stretching his legs as far as they'd go.  
  
I got more in me  
  
And you can set it free  
  
I can catch the moon in my hand  
  
Don't you know who I am  
  
He fell on the floor to his knees and began to spin around on them and then got up. Kicking his legs high in the air while wrapping his arms around himself.  
  
Remember my name  
  
(Fame)  
  
I'm gonna live forever  
  
I'm gonna learn how to fly (He leaped into the air)  
  
(High)  
  
I feel it coming together  
  
People will see me and cry (he ran his hands down his body while running in place)  
  
(Fame)  
  
I'm gonna make it to heaven  
  
Light up the sky like a flame (He did a somersault)  
  
(Fame)  
  
I'm gonna live forever  
  
Baby remember my name (He spinned on his heels several times before stooping in a split)  
  
Remember  
  
Remember  
  
Remember  
  
Remember  
  
Remember  
  
Remember  
  
Remember  
  
Remember  
  
Baby hold me tight  
  
Cause you can make it right  
  
You can shoot me straight to the top  
  
Give me love and take all I've got to give  
  
Evan looked into the crowd; he knew that he would be able to do it! He just had to get in. He began to make stronger moves, moving his body around while stretching to impossible places. He would be the next best thing.  
  
Baby I'll be tough  
  
Too much is not enough  
  
I'll grab your heart 'til it breaks  
  
Ooh I got what it takes  
  
He did a couple of flips and than he kicked his leg up throwing his head back.  
  
(Fame)  
  
I'm gonna live forever  
  
I'm gonna learn how to fly ( He half leaped and half twirled across the stage floor)  
  
(High)  
  
I feel it coming together  
  
People will see me and cry (He was crying now, oh yes he was! He was gonna make it!)  
  
(Fame)  
  
I'm gonna make it to heaven  
  
Light up the sky like a flame (This would be his grand finale)  
  
(Fame)  
  
I'm gonna live forever  
  
Baby remember my name (He twirled and twirled)  
  
Remember (and twirled)  
  
Remember  
  
Remember  
  
Remember (still twirling)  
  
Remember  
  
Remember  
  
Remember (about to stop twirling)  
  
Fame!  
  
He was on his knees now, perspiration mixing with tears, his chest heaved as he breathed in and out. He had made it. He had gone against the odds. Now he waited for the others to make there decisions.  
  
"Evan Daniels, we ask you to stand before us." Evan walked over to them, his eyes lowered to the ground. He was so afraid to look up, he had tried and now he would know if it was worth it, if it was good enough. "Look at me Daniels."  
  
Evan lifted his eyes and saw tears in their eyes. "You're in," a woman said. Evan started to cry, his hands to his face. He had made it! His dreams were coming true. He turned and saw his parents waiting for him by the stage door.  
  
"We new you could do it son." His father said.  
  
"Oh dad!" He cried out and they hugged. Evan tossed his back pack over his shoulder, abandoning his skateboard. He left the building with his parents; on the other side of the street was Gambit.  
  
Gambit narrowed his eyes, squinting to see who it was. He realized that the one in the fruity outfit was none other than Spyke from the X Men! He freaked out.  
  
"Ave Maria!" He shouted.  
  
**************************************************************************** *  
  
Okay I know, I know. Remy is French not Spanish. But you'll understand in the next chapter when Remy Lebeau makes his debut. Plus I am doing all of the characters. I have an idea for half of them. The other half I'm trying to think of some, and duh the acolytes and BoM is included. Not having them would be like a death sentence. I don't own any of the characters or songs or whatever. I hope you guys liked this chapter (I on the other hand think it sort of sux) Review please :)  
  
Sam 


	6. Remy LeBeau is really Jose who?

Hi guys, here is Remy's truth, one I love Remy so don't flame me, flame my muse(s). The song Preciosa is by Marc Anthony and I will have the translation of the words by it and I own nothing else familiar and maybe unfamiliar. Number two I am a Puerto Rican, so I know I'm stereotyping all PR as well as Hispanic men. Anyway, good or bad reviews please, I promise after this it'll get better. Plus, to understand you either had to have lived in the ghetto projects or watched the movies of 'us' (particularly the substitute is a good visual) anyway this is meant to be fun, so I hope no one is offended plus the translation is whacky since translating from one language to another often makes no sense.  
  
*Flashbacks* that's what the start stuff means  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
Remy Lebeau ran as fast as he could back to the Acolytes headquarters. He was losing it; memories of his younger years came into play. He remembered when he had just turned seventeen three years ago, he had changed his complete outlook, moved out to New Orleans from Harlem and picked up the accent quickly. In the quiet of his room he put on his favorite song in the c.d. player and reminisced.  
  
Flashback:  
  
Yo se lo que son los encantos (I know what are the enchantments)  
  
de mi borinquen hermosa (Of my Beautiful 'borinquen' {Puerto Rico})  
  
por eso la quiero yo tanto (That's why i love her so much)  
  
por siempre la llamare Preciosa (For always i shall call her precious)  
  
*Jose Miguel Gonzales (aka Remy LeBeau) walked out of his apartment in the projects. A gun shot resounded, he barely turned his head when the cops ran over to the bodega (grocery store), he was accustomed to this.*  
  
yo se de sus hembras triguenas (I know about her tanned females)  
  
se del olor de sus rosas (I know of the smell of her roses)  
  
por eso a mi tierra riquena (That's why to my rich land)  
  
por siempre la llamare Preciosa (i will always call her Precious)  
  
*He noticed when a bootylicious girl with dyed blonde hair walked by him.  
  
"Oye Mami, que pasa?" (Hey Mami, what's happening) Jose said wearing a tank top and a million crosses on his neck, his pants were baggy and up to his knees and he wore some busted up Timbs, on his arm was a tattoo of the Puerto Rican flag with a coqui (small frog that only lives in PR). When the girl paid him no mind and just glared he started to call her bad words, "You ugly anyway!"*  
  
Isla del caribe (Island of the Carribean)  
  
Isla del caribe (Island of the Carribean)  
  
Borinquen (meaning Puerto Rico)  
  
Preciosa te llaman las olas (Precious the waves call you)  
  
del mar que te bana (The ocean that bathes you)  
  
Preciosa por ser un encanto (Precious for being an enchantment)  
  
por ser un Eden (for being an Eden)  
  
Y tienes la noble hidalguia (And you have the noble league) Espana y el fiero canto del indio bravo (Spain and the feiry song of the indian brave)  
  
lo tienes tambien (You have that too)  
  
*That was the hundred time that day Jose got shot down. He went back home after buying a Corona, and sat down in front of his television to watch Sabado Gigante. His mother came in and started to yell at him.  
  
"Oye m'ijo! Llegaron las cartas (Listen my son, did the mail get here?)" Jose rolled his eyes at his mother.  
  
"Yeah, mami but the welfare check didn't come in," his mother nodded and went to the kitchen to make some delicious Spanish meals that will clog your arteries and make your cholesterol soar to the sky.*  
  
[Coro:]  
  
Preciosa te llaman los bardos (Precious the bards call you)  
  
que cantan tu historia (That sing your story)  
  
No importa el tirano te trate (Doesn't matter the tyrant that treats)  
  
con negra maldad (with black evil)  
  
Preciosa seras sin bandera (Precious you can be without a flag)  
  
sin lauros, ni gloria (without {I don't know}, without glory)  
  
Preciosa, Preciosa (Precious, Precious)  
  
*Jose left his home to go to the catholic church down the street, the priest was following him in smelling like cigarillos (cigarretes).  
  
"Hola Jose! (Hi Jose!) How eez de drug rehabeeleetatiyon goin'?" Jose shrugged.  
  
"Okay, I want to confess." He entered the little room.  
  
"Okay jou can go now."  
  
"Okay, I cut someone in the face, I stole a piece of bread from the bodega down the street and I took the Lord's name in vain."  
  
"How many times son?" Jose thought hard.  
  
"I wish not to discuss." He got his penance and left the church.*  
  
te llaman los hijos de la libertad (They call you the son of liberty)  
  
Preciosa te llevo dentro (Precious i hold you inside)  
  
muy dentro di mi corazon (Deep inside my heart)  
  
y mientras mas pasa el tiempo (And the more the time passes)  
  
en ti se vuelca mi amor (In you is my love)  
  
*That day Jose, as he was eating his meal he thought about his life, he couldn't get any girls, he still lived with his mama, and sadly the gun shots outside his window late at night wasn't helping, he decided to change his life. He needed new ways to get girls man.  
  
His mother had married a 'rich' man who lived in the apartment down the hall so Jose found himself free to go places. He remembered his friend from across the street who had moved down south and decided to join him there, and that is how Remy Lebeau came to be.*  
  
porque ahora es que comprendo (Because now is that i understand)  
  
porque ahora es que comprendo (Because now is that i understand)  
  
que aunque pase lo que pase (That whatever happens that happens)  
  
yo sere puertoriqueno (I will be Puerto Rican)  
  
yo sere puertoriqueno (I will be Puerto Rican)  
  
por donde quiera que ande, ooohhh (And anywhere I go)  
  
por que lo llevo en la sangre (Because i take it in my blood)  
  
por herencia de mis padres (as inheritance from my parents)  
  
y con orgullo repito (and with pride i repeat)  
  
yo te quiero Puerto Rico (I love you Puerto Rico)  
  
yo te quiero Puerto Rico (I love you Puerto Rico)  
  
*Jose dyed his dark brown hair auburn and put on demon eye contacts. He had his mutation for long time but he never used it, he bought a deck of cards for material at ninety nine cents and a trench coat from the Salvation Army. Adapting a Cajun accent from New Orleans, he became who he was now!*  
  
y por eso es que me nace hoy (And that's why it's born in me today)  
  
dedicarle este canto (to dedicate this song)  
  
a ese noble jibarito Raphael (To that noble hillbilly Raphael)  
  
y a mi isla del encanto (and to my island of enchantment)  
  
yo te quiero Puerto Rico (I love you Puerto Rico)  
  
yo te quiero Puerto Rico (I love you Puerto Rico)  
  
Present:  
  
Remy heard a noise at the open window in his bedroom; he quickly took the c.d. out of the stereo and chucked it over his shoulder. He watched as Rogue ran away, what she was doing at his window he didn't know. The point was he hoped she didn't hear him singing along to that song, or she would know the truth behind Remy Lebeau!  
  
**************************************************************************** *  
  
Okay that was stupid, anyway I got him out of the way. Next is Rogue, hope you guys don't abandon me. Review please 


	7. Rogue and Gollum have a lot in common

I own nothing, not even the character I am parodying in this chapter, anyway hope you guys like it. My brothers are freaked out cause they think it's scary. Review me what you guys think. Plus 'LEFT' is evil and 'RIGHT' is good, keep that in mind. **************************************************************************** ** *RogueHero is right, I originally got the idea from Tom Cruise in that movie that I forgot and besides never watched, and from Saved by the Bell (which I'm embarrassed to say was my favorite show as a kid) and The Nanny (The Butler did it) I thought I had mentioned who did it but it's never too late to disclaim now, lol. SSJ Tokya-I love the Monk, that dude is too much. Hope I don't disappoint you though (cause I sure am with this chapter tsk tsk to me). Latin Mutant! Represent! I didn't think a lot of people would like Remy's chapter.* ****************************************************************************  
  
Rogue entered her bedroom and almost started to tear, she thought that Remy had been real turns out the he was just another liar in the world. But than she remembered that she was a liar too. She looked into her dresser drawer and took out the pills that her psychologist had told her to take. She threw them against a wall and suddenly felt her true self emerging. The X men hated her, she just new it.  
  
Rogue looked into the mirror, her face turned to the right and her eyes were bright, her smile soft and her voice sweet. "No, they love me Rogue they do, the X Men are our friends."  
  
Her face than turned to the left and her eyebrows were drawn together, her eyes narrowed and a sneer played by her lips. "NO! NO! THEY DON'T LOVE YOU ROGUE! THEY HATE YOU!"  
  
Right, "The Professor wants to help me touch again Rogue, he wants to help me."  
  
Left, "NO, HE DOESN'T WANT TO HELP US! HE WANTS TO KILL US!"  
  
Right, "You're scaring me, please go away."  
  
Left, "NO AH WILL NOT GO AWAY YOU UGLY GIRL! NOBODY WANTS YOU! AND IN CASE YOU FORGOT SCOTT'S WITH JEAN!"  
  
Right, "Scott loves me; he says ah'm his angel. Scott's mah friend."  
  
Left, "SCOTT ISN'T YOUR FRIEND. WE SHOULD KILL HIM, YES YES! WE SHALL KILL HIM NOW!"  
  
Right, "No, don't hurt him, please go away. Scott is our friend."  
  
Left, "AH'LL KILL JEAN TOO! SHE STOLE MAH PRECIOUS!"  
  
Right, "Jean didn't steal your precious, he followed her happily."  
  
Left, "SHUT UP! SHE STOLE MAH PRECIOUS AND AH SHALL HAVE IT BACK, YES YES! AH WILL BRING BACK MAH PRECIOUS AND HE WILL LOVE ME!"  
  
Right, Rogue is crying now, a forlorn look on her face. "She never stole our precious, Jean is our friend. We can trust Jean."  
  
Left, "NO NO! JEAN IS NOT OUR FRIEND, JEAN IS EVIL AND JEAN WANTS OUR PRECIOUS, YES YES JEAN STOLE OUR PRECIOUS." At that moment Kurt walks into the room.  
  
"Hi Rogue, I vas vondering if you had my chem. book." Kurt smiled at her  
  
Right, "Okay, ah will give it to you now," she says with a smile.  
  
Left, "NO NO! YOU CAN'T HAVE MAH BOOK, NO! IT'S MINE!" Kurt jumps at how scary Rogue was.  
  
"I'm sorry vhat happened?" He was confused.  
  
Right, "Nothing Kurt, here is your book." She hands it to him but the minute Kurt puts his hands on it, she snatches it back.  
  
Left, "DON'T STEAL MAH BOOK! Ah'LL KILL YOU YOU BLUE BALL OF FUR! AHHHH, YOU STOLE MAH PRECIOUS, GIVE ME BACK MAH PRECIOUS!" Kurt ran off and bumped into the Professor who was pushing his wheel chair, he blinked his eyes and the Professor was seated on it, whistling.  
  
Rogue: Right, "Ya see that's why we never have friends." Rogue said sadly.  
  
Left, "YOU HAVE ME ROGUE, HA HA HA, YOU HAVE ME! NOW LET'S GO GET OUR PRECIOUS BACK!"  
  
Right, "If ya can't beat 'em, join 'em."  
  
**************************************************************************** **  
  
One that was scary to write, two it wasn't as good as I expected but that doesn't matter, review and pretend you like it. . . Okay don't pretend be brutally honest. Anyway, Kurt is next. And Gollum owns this parody on him, not me.  
  
Sam 


	8. Xavier's legs and Kurt's body

Yeay! Reviews! Thanks guys you make writing worthwhile. I decided to do shout outs so here it is! *Possom2009, Kakegods, Flamable, Wildcats130, Pyroluver, Dragonfire99, Kiki Cabou, Rogue 151, The Rogue Witch, Flame31, Taineyah, RahneMan, Molly, Piotr's girl, SSJ Tokya, Linda J., Rogue Wanderer, Serpentine013x, Lyranfan, Girl Number 1,RoguePheonix, Storm- Pietro, Shadowed Smiles, Smurf, Electric Russian, Me, Talon, Kage-Robot-of- Darkness, Evil Vampire Lady, Latin Mutant, Rogue Hero, The Incredible Rusty, Ooka-Booka* Thank you all! You really made me like writing this fic. I was so worried about it since I've never done anything beyond Romance, but now (crying) I can expand my horizons! Plus I just finished writing it, the beginning is boring but the end is better, much better! Anyway, enough with my blabbering, on with the story! *Flashbacks* **************************************************************************** **  
  
Kurt ran into his bedroom, the one he shared alone. He didn't want to ever be near Rogue again. He'd have to speak to the Professor about her secret, but wait! What if in retaliation Rogue touches him and learns his secret. He lay on his bed and curled up into a fetal position, remembering the reason why he was at the institute, the secret that only the Professor knew. As he reminisced he remembered the poem Kitty had given him.  
  
*Kurt was a normal looking twelve year old boy who loved to joke around. He had peach colored skin with a bit of blue fuzz in all the right places. His indigo colored hair was darker than the rest of his peach (blue) fuzz. He loved to go into peoples things.*  
  
I'm aware some stare at my hair.  
  
In fact, to be fair,  
  
Some really despair of my hair.  
  
*He had looked in his adopted mother's drawers and found her, OMG, bra! Putting it on he realized that that surely must be the difference between a man and a woman. It was black and lacy with little beads sown in the middle. In fact it looked quite pretty after he pulled on the matching underwear.*  
  
But I don't care,  
  
Cause they're not aware,  
  
Nor are they debonair.  
  
*Laughing joyously, he teleported to his adopted sisters bedroom and took one of her pretty red dresses, the one with the sequins all over that her mother didn't know she had. Luckily for him, her sister had bought a pair of shoes too big, so he took those with him and disappeared back into his parents bedroom, and laid it out on the bed besides the pretty under clothing he had previously dawned.*  
  
In fact, they're just square.  
  
They see hair down to there,  
  
Say, 'Beware' and go off on a tear!  
  
*The next stop was in his grandmother's room. There he dawned a set of pearls that looped four times around his neck, that would go perfect with his new outfit.*  
  
I say, 'No fair!'  
  
A head that's bare is really nowhere.  
  
So be like a bear, be fair with your hair!  
  
*But wait! He realized that his hair was a tangled mess. He couldn't go out that way and decided to use the new body wash he had seen his father bring in from a discount store. There it was in a brown paper bag.*  
  
Show it you care.  
  
Wear it to there.  
  
Or to there.  
  
Or to there, if you dare!  
  
*Oh he was so excited. He pulled the two large bottles and went into the bathroom. He began to rub it in his hair in glee and washed the foam, creating as he lathered. This was always the best part, when he felt it soothe his hair. He decided to style his hair after he bathed and dried.*  
  
My wife bought some hair at a fair, to use as a spare.  
  
Did I care?  
  
Au contraire!  
  
Spare hair is fair!  
  
*He dried his whole body with a fluffy blue towel and looked on the counter for some lotion. It was another large bottle. Without thinking he began to rub it all over his body. It felt so good, giving him a tingling sensation that he rubbed more fervently until her almost finished the bottle off.*  
  
In fact, hair can be rare.  
  
Fred Astair got no hair,  
  
Nor does a chair,  
  
Nor nor a chocolate eclair,  
  
And where is the hair on a pear?  
  
*He looked at the words and realized it said something in English that he couldn't pronounce since his English hadn't yet developed. All he understood was hair lotion, and thus he decided rubbing it on his head wouldn't hurt.*  
  
Nowhere, mon frere!  
  
So now that I've shared this affair of the hair,  
  
I'm going to repair to my lair and use Nair, do you care?  
  
*He dressed in his little outfit and yawned. It had been a long day. He threw the clothes on a corner of the floor, looking sadly at it since he wouldn't be able to dress prettily for his parents. He entered his bed and had a wonderful dream, regardless of the ever present itch that surrounded his body.*  
  
(Beard Poem)  
  
Here's my beard.  
  
Ain't it wierd?  
  
Don't be sceered,  
  
Just a beard.  
  
*That morning he woke up and stretched his arms wide, when he looked at his already 'disfigured' hands he screamed, high pitched. His adopted parents ran into the room and began to scream.  
  
"Ein Mörder Teppich," they shouted. Kurt wondered why they were calling him 'a killer carpet', he began to cry not understanding what was going on. "Wo das vaccum Reinigungsmittel ist?" Kurt started to cry harder, why were his parents asking for a vacuum cleaner. He couldn't understand.  
  
He than got up and tried to run away but his parents grabbed him by the now blue tail and pulled him back towards them. When they saw his eyes Kurt's mother cried, his yellow eyes stood out against the blue mass of fur on his skin. He remembered how they had used the sheep shearer to shore off some of the fur so that he was at least a little visible.  
  
That night he had received a visit from Charles Xavier, who was a powerful mutant.  
  
"Hello Kurt, my name is Charles Xavier and I'm handicapped." The Professor said. Kurt raised an eyebrow at the Professor's perfect German. He wondered why he would mention such obvious news. "You see, I'm like you, marred by the world's circumstances. As a child I spilled a little bit of Rogaine just as you did on my legs and suddenly the hair began to grown and become alive. It ate my flesh and left me with nothing but bone." The professor began to cry, "I'm just so afraid it will happen to you!"  
  
Kurt screamed with all his might at the tale. He had nightmares for weeks until he received the call from Xavier to join him at his institute. Kurt decided that only this man could save him from his cruel fate! The fate of having his fur eat all of his body, and thus was how he joined the X Men!*  
  
***  
  
Kurt rolled on his back and wondered why he had poured 'Mane & Tail' hair growth conditioning lotion, all over his body. He knew that it was because Gott had wanted him to help that poor man in the wheelchair. Xavier had saved his life. He thought of his true mother and how she came to be and wondered if her fate had been worst than his. Ignoring the thought he took out the garden shears hidden in his desk to find the Professor, so that he could trim his fur.  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
That was so dumb at first but after I got to Xavier I felt much better after the chapter. I couldn't find a song for Kurt and there fore used a poem called Hair Poem by George Carlin. Hope you guys liked it. Next is Mystique's chapter. Review please. 


	9. Mutated Sea Bass

Only one line saved my last chapter from destruction, lol. I hope you guys enjoy this one as well and thanks for reviewing  
  
*Flashbacks* Plus, I made her skin scaly in this fic **************************************************************************** *  
  
Mystique stood before the large, vast ocean. She thought of when she was born and how she came to be. Her life had changed so much after her mutation, she had been so young, and she hadn't understood the reality of the land until that fateful day when she swam into a sewer line. Without thinking she threw herself into the ocean and marveled at the feel of the water against her dehydrated scaly skin.  
  
*She was a tiny blue sea bass that swam in the ocean; her gills and dark blue skin were very alluring and beautiful. She often escaped the nets and hooks that the sailors would cast her way, trying to catch the most beautiful sea bass in the world. She wandered about so many times and ignored her mother who told her constantly to stop running off. She remembered that fateful day when she met her fate.*  
  
I'm not supposed to be scared of anything  
  
But I don't know where I am  
  
I wish that I could move but I'm exhausted  
  
And nobody understands  
  
I'm tryin' hard to breathe now but there's no air in my lungs  
  
There's no one here to talk to  
  
And the pain inside is making me numb  
  
*She was found by a boy who was fishing with a net and put her in a bowl along with four tiny turtles. The boy was on his way home when he tripped over a curb and dropped the bowl onto a Japanese man's head who abided in a sewer. Hamato, an ex Japanese ninja who was kicked out of his clan for supposedly being a betrayer was that man!  
  
Hamato took her and her new friends in and they lived with the rats and other disgusting sewer thingy's in a beautiful home built by Hamato (in the sewers? YES!). But one day everything changed!*  
  
I try to hold this, under control  
  
They can't help me  
  
'Cause no one knows  
  
Now I'm going through changes, changes  
  
God I feel so frustrated lately  
  
When I get suffocated save me  
  
Now I'm going through changes, changes  
  
*One day weird pink ooze . . . oozed into the sewer and covered the turtles as well as the bowled sea bass. Hamato ran over to them and began to wipe off the ooze from his little children. Suddenly the turtles began to grow and became the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Hamato's body also underwent a change and he became a giant rat. They looked at their pink covered sea bass.  
  
Suddenly it began to grow and broke its little dirty plastic bowl because Hamato was poor and had to find one in the garbage dump even though he can build a really beautiful home in the sewers. She sprouted legs and arms and long red hair for some odd reason, but she remained blue. Hamato looked upon them and realized that they were new beings and thus needed new names.  
  
"You shall be Leonardo, because I think that's a cool name," he said. "And you shall be Donatello, because we need a smart turtle to balance out Michelangelo who shall be the stupid one who makes surfers look bad. And you shall be Rafael and want to fight all the time having no sense of caring if your team mates get hurt or not."  
  
"And I?" Came the deep alto voice of the very blue, very sexy mutated sea bass.  
  
"Ah, my little blue fish, you shall be," he thought really hard. In fact he lasted there for days, until some one through a bottle in the sewer and it hit him on the head. "You shall be Mystic Juice." Mystic Juice smiled.*  
  
I'm feelin' weak and weary walkin' through this world alone  
  
Everything I say, every word of it, cuts me to the bone  
  
I've got something to say but now I got nowhere to turn  
  
It feels like I've been buried underneath all the weight of the world  
  
*Mystic Juice trained hard, night and day with her fellow team mates. They fought crime together and all that good stuff. But than one day she walked into the sewer coming home early from saving the day (yet again) and found Splinter with April, doing the 'wild' thing.  
  
"How could you Splinter? How could you play Twister with her! I'm having your baby!" She covered her belly and ran away; the turtles barely looked up as they ate venomously at their 'borrowed' pizza that they swore they never stole from the pizza shop that was right under the sewer.  
  
Mystic Juice ran and ran until she came across a large building. There she hoped to find solace for her pain.*  
  
I try to hold this, under control  
  
They can't help me  
  
'Cause no one knows  
  
Now I'm going through changes, changes  
  
God I feel so frustrated lately  
  
When I get suffocated save me  
  
Now I'm going through changes, changes  
  
*Mystic Juice was taken in by a man named Magneto; he offered her a home and stood by her as she gave birth to a blue haired baby. She was glad that he wasn't fuzzy like his father and was blue tinted like her, even if his coloring was less prominent. She than decided to join Magneto's team of fellow mutants where she fought by his side.  
  
Unfortunately for some odd reason whenever she mentioned her name people laughed and thus she shortened it and improved it by calling herself Mystique.*  
  
I'm blind and shaking  
  
Bound and breaking  
  
I hope I make it through all these changes  
  
Mystique swam back to shore and found herself standing before Magneto, the only one who knew her past.  
  
"Reminiscing?" he asked. She nodded and he took her away in his little Metal orb and they flew away.  
  
**************************************************************************  
  
Okay that was weird, anyway Magneto's next, my little brother came up with his truth it's so funny, in a dumb way anyway. Review please. I don't own Changes by 3 Doors Down, or Mystic Juice nor do I own the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles which was the best cartoon in the world! Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (3x) Turtles in a half shell, Turtle Power! 


	10. Evil equals Eval

Hi guys! Thanks for the reviews. Well here is the next segment. The idea was created by Andy, my little brother. He had us dying with it so I hope that you guys feel that way as well.  
  
**************************************************************************** *  
  
Magneto led Mystique into her bedroom and sent Remy to get a Tylenol and a cup of water for her head ache.  
  
"Do not disturb me." He told the other acolytes who were sitting in the living room eating and speaking loudly. He went into his study and made sure that the door was locked and secure. He than took off his cape and hung it on a coat hanger along with his helmet. Walking over to the high oak desk, he moved his books aside and sat down on it.  
  
After unbuttoning his pants, he removed them to reveal the stilts that were attached to his tiny legs. Than he unbuttoned his shirt and pulled it off, revealing to prosthetic hands that were attached to his little ones. Pulling off his full head of hair which he placed atop a model head, he revealed the shiny baldness of his cranium.  
  
"Come here," said the voice on the little box, taped to his chest. The little man walked over to the closet door and opened it with his prosthetic hand. Out came a taller version of him self.  
  
"Oh Mini Me, you are so deliciously evil!" Dr. Evil stepped out and removed the fake body parts from his mini clone.  
  
All the , small things  
True care, truth brings  
I'll take, one lift  
Your ride, best trip  
  
He had worked so hard to conquer the world, but stupid Powers didn't allow him to fulfill his life long dream of world domination, so he decided to do things differently, so as not to alert the government on his plans. He had escaped in his little pod and managed to come back from space with a new idea.  
  
Frau had told him about the mutants that were taking over the world, having introduced him before to her one eyed lover, Unibrow, who just so happened to be a mutant as well. Apparently his clone had the ability to manipulate metal and thus Dr. Evil and Mini Me became Magneto!  
  
After doing some brain washing and plastic surgery, Dr. Evil attempted to change Scott into thinking that he was truly the son of Magneto. He even gave him false memories and bought him a 'twin sister' so that he would think that he had a family. But sadly his son turned out to be a pathetic fruit that truly cared about him and not about 'evil'.  
  
Always, I know  
You'll be at my show  
Watching, waiting, commiserating  
  
"Oh well, it's just you and me," he said and gave his little clone a hug. Mini me nodded his head and patted him on the back. They were about to leave when a knock came on the door. Quickly he dressed his clone into his Magneto suit and Mini me opened the door.  
  
"Did I not say I do not want to be disturbed?" Mini mouthed. Dr. Evil hid underneath the table.  
  
"But Fred Dukes is downstairs Magneto," Piotr said. 'Magneto' rolled his eyes, Mini Me had the sudden urge of biting him in the nuts but refrained.  
  
"Fine send him in," Magneto stood by the door and suddenly the ground began to shake. He than ran over to the desk where Dr. Evil abided, Dr. Evil shoved him away so as not to be found, Mini Me tripped and his prosthetic legs shot out from under him. Than Fred came in wearing a Scottish kilt since he had just come from the parade.  
  
Say it ain't so, I will not go, turn the lights off, carry me home  
Na, na na na na na na na na na (2x)  
  
"Eh, you're da bebe," Fred said, as he watched the little midget with super long arms run away.  
  
"Eeep! Eeep!" Mini Me was afraid. Where's the mojo? He thought, but than remembered this was Fred not Fat Bastard. Fred's stomach growled, he realized that he missed lunch.  
  
"Get in mah belle!" He cried out and chased an 'eeping' Mini Me with super long arms.  
  
The door banged open and Fred turned swiftly around. Pietro stood by the door.  
  
"Where is my father?" He asked. Fred tried to find him but figured it was probably a figure of his imagination like the evil monkey in his closet. He shrugged his shoulders and left the room along with Pietro.  
  
Late night, come home  
Work sucks, I know  
She left me roses by the stairs, surprises let me know she cares  
  
Dr. Evil managed to get out from under the table with Mini Me's arms wrapped around his leg. He pulled him off and gave him a hug and Mini Mr. Bigglesworth so that he could pet him, unfortunately when he returned with Mini Me's bottle; Mini Mr. Bigglesworth was gnawed to the bone.  
  
"How many times do I have to tell you, do not eat Mr. Bigglesworth, now I have to buy you another one and this is seven times too many Mini Me," he than crossed his arms and gave him an angry look. Suddenly the window flew open and Frau flew in with a hand glider.  
  
"Drrrr. Eval, we have a prrrroblem," she said as she adjusted her suit and patted her hair. Dr. Evil sat on the edge of the desk and than slid off to the floor, quickly he adjusted himself.  
  
Say it ain't so, I will not go, turn the lights off, carry me home  
Na, na·  
Say it ain't so, I will not go, turn the lights off, carry me home  
  
"Apparrrently ze X Men are planning to come overrr here and attack ze headquarrrters."  
  
"Perfect, Frau, I'll speak to you later," he said and stuck his finger next to his lip. "You know you'll always be my sugah momma," and with a smile he made her leave.  
  
"Send me ze PLAAAANE!" she said, rather loudly.  
  
Keep your head still, I'll be your thrill, the night will go on, my little  
windmill  
Say it ain't so, I will not go, turn the lights off, carry me home Keep your head still, I'll be your thrill, the night will go on, my little  
windmill  
  
Piotr politely knocked on the door and entered when he heard a 'come in'. Speaking with Magneto a minute he went off to go away on the trip he was allowed to go on. Magneto looked outside his office and locked the door once again.  
  
"Oh Mini Me, you complete me," and Dr. Evil gave 'Magneto' a hug.  
  
****************************************************************************  
  
That was hard, next is Colossus, I hope you liked this chapter, review please. OH YEAH, and Family Guy owns a couple of things and so does Blink 182. 


	11. I am not Piotr!

Writers block, sucks eggs. I am so sorry for taking so long with this chapter. I did not know how to come about this, so if it sucks. Forgive me Piotr's Girl (plus I love your new story 'Search of the Unknown', hope to read more soon). Anyway here it is.  
  
*************************************************************************  
  
Arnold Schwarzenegger hugged all of the cast members, he had finally finished terminator three and he would be going home that evening. He went up to his room and made a phone call.  
  
"Yes sirrr, I weel be dere sooooon. Thonk you forrr letting me take this trrrip," he hung up the phone after listening to whatever the other person had to say and packed his suit case. He adjusted his Hawaiian shirt and fixed the crotch of his khakis and made his way downstairs with his suit case. He entered the cab awaiting him and directed it towards the Californian government. There he changed into a suit and went to make his announcements.  
  
*Back at the Acolytes headquarters*  
  
"Ya know, Remy t'inks dat maybe Piotr is at da clubs," Remy said, offering to the group and the silent Magneto his opinions on why Piotr needed to constantly take his trips.  
  
"Ah come on mate, ya know that Piotr don't even know 'bout any clubs, hell, he doesn't seem ta know much 'bout anythin'." Pyro said.  
  
"Hush all of you!" Magneto commanded as the news came on, the governor of California would be making his speech.  
  
"Hello, evrrryvone, I, Arrnold Schwarrrzenegger not Piotr Rasputin aka Colossus from da Acolytes, am stonding herre beforrre you, to let you know dat I will brrring Caleefornya to its ultimate . . .," and thus did Arnold go on.  
  
"Eso se suena como Pedro, ahem, Remy means dat dat sounds a lot like Piotr," Remy corrected himself. He got a shrug from Pyro and a confused look from Magneto. Magneto opened his mouth.  
  
"That is not Piotr you imbecile. That looks nothing like him, Piotr has black hair and he's super white. I will not stand any more of this." Magneto stood up and walked down the hall, unfortunately, his leg cracked and he ended up hopping on one 'foot' while the other dragged on the floor behind him, stuck to his pants.  
  
On the day I was born, the nurses all gathered 'round  
  
And they gazed in wide wonder, at the joy they had found  
  
The head nurse spoke up, and she said leave this one alone  
  
She could tell right away, that I was bad to the bone  
  
Bad to the bone  
  
Bad to the bone  
  
B-B-B-B-Bad to the bone  
  
B-B-B-B-Bad  
  
B-B-B-B-Bad  
  
Bad to the bone  
  
"Thonk you," Arnold finished and made his way to his wife. "Ah Marria, dis is my dream come trrrue." He gurgled and gave her a hug. He truly loved her, and it wasn't because she has a huge connection the Kennedy's and that probably helped him get elected governor. He loved her with true Hollywood passion. They strolled over to the limo where he would be going back to do his 'duties'.  
  
"I sholl miss you Marria," Arnold said and gave her a passionate kiss. He than walked across the street cause the limo driver was too stupid to make a U-Turn. Cameras were every where, suddenly a huge gigantic truck full of gigantic explosive stuff headed towards him.  
  
"Noooooooooooooooooooo!" Arnold shouted.  
  
"Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeees!" Jean Claude Van Damme, who is now out of work, shouted  
  
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Marrria, er, Maria shouted.  
  
"Yessssssssssssssssssss!" Gary Coleman, who also ran for governor and lost, shouted.  
  
Arnold's body was suddenly engulfed by metal, and the truck exploded along with the stupid truck driver who tried to kill Arnold. Arnold looked around and saw the camera's flashing, immediately he changed back to his normal self and climbed into the limo.  
  
I broke a thousand hearts, before I met you  
  
I'll break a thousand more baby, before I am through  
  
I wanna be yours pretty baby, yours and yours alone  
  
I'm here to tell ya honey, that I'm bad to the bone  
  
Bad to the bone  
  
B-B-B-Bad  
  
B-B-B-Bad  
  
B-B-B-Bad  
  
Bad to the bone  
  
Remy and John watched in shock as the governor of California turned his body into metal and smashed the truck.  
  
"Are ya t'inking, what Remy's t'inking," Remy asked Pyro. Pyro stared at the screen.  
  
"Yer damn right, I'm thinkin' that that guy is Piotr's clone! I knew that the 'Sixth Day' was real! We should hurt 'im," Pyro said, laughing maniacally. Remy rolled his eyes and watched as they continued to watch the truck smash into the metallic man on screen.  
  
Meanwhile, Arnold quickly entered his private Jet and ran into the bathroom. He had a lot of work to do. Quickly he rubbed the black dye in his head and combed it back. Then he took out his favorite shade of Cover Girl's eight hour foundation in Porcelain and rubbed it over his face, chest and arms. He changed into his uniform and put his black contacts on.  
  
"Derre, dey will neva know da trrruth about me." He said aloud. Then when the plane landed, he met up with the Acolytes plane and climbed in, silent and serious as usual.  
  
I make a rich woman beg, I'll make a good woman steal  
  
I'll make an old woman blush, and make a young woman squeal  
  
I wanna be yours pretty baby, yours and yours alone  
  
I'm here to tell ya honey, that I'm bad to the bone  
  
B-B-B-B-Bad  
  
B-B-B-B-Bad  
  
B-B-B-B-Bad  
  
Bad to the bone  
  
Magneto waited in the planning room, along with Remy and Pyro, Arnold, er, Piotr walked in and sat beside them.  
  
"Hello Piotr, we are glad to see you have returned." Piotr nodded at Magneto's statement. "I have news for everyone! The bad news is that we have what Pyro has smartly figured out to be Piotr's" he quoted with his fingers, " 'clone', and so we shall attempt the assassination of his," he quoted with his fingers again, " 'clone' as soon as possible," Piotr's eyes grew wide. "Now the good news is that we have a new member of the acolyte's team." Remy grinned sexily.  
  
"Is it Jose's amor Rogue," Magneto, Piotr and Pyro gave him a look. "I mean Remy."  
  
"I'm glad you remember that Remy, for a minute there I thought you lost your mi-*crackle,crackle* Exc-*crackle, crackle*, me," Magneto said and turned around, he replaced the batteries on his little voice box machine and turned swiftly back around. "Ahem, anyway we have a new member. Frau, can you please join us." She walked in and sat on the chair.  
  
"Hello Everryvone, my name is FRAU!!!" Frau shouted. The acolytes blinked, they just coughed into their hands and accepted her into their group. Than they made plans to assassinate Arnold Schwarzenegger.  
  
***  
  
Meanwhile, in the institute a particular red head was making her way out of her room. She went to break her plans with Scott for the next day since she had a doctor's appointment. Jean thanked him since he agreed to post pone the plans and went to bed.  
  
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Okay well that's all, sorry for the wait, review please, even if you're all mad at me, plus Jean is next, oh I got plans for her. But not really bad ones please don't leave me all you Jean fans! Don't go!!!!!!!!!!! 


	12. Dude looks like a what?

Okay here is my next chapter *Flashbacks* ***********************************************************************  
  
"Okay John, now I need you to cough for me," the doctor said. The young man coughed and the doctor nodded his head. "Very good, very good, you sound fine. Make a follow up before you leave."  
  
A tall guy who looked a lot like Scott except with longer hair and without the glasses made his way to the front and spoke to the secretary.  
  
"Hey, I need to make an appointment," he said. His voice was between the alto and tenor and he was actually a pretty cute guy, except his eyebrows were a little on the thin side.  
  
"Here's your appointment sweetie, and my number," the secretary said. The guy grinned.  
  
"Sorry, I don't swing that way," he said and left the office.  
  
*** Dude Looks Like A Lady  
  
Dude Looks Like A Lady  
  
Dude Looks Like A Lady  
  
Dude Looks Like A Lady ***  
  
John Grey made his way down the street to the café/diner that he usually stopped at when he needed to change. Entering the Unisex bathroom, he went in and changed from his baggy pants, and sweater, to a ¾ length top and a pair of tight jeans, on his dainty feet where sandals. He groaned and stuck his hand in his pants to adjust his package.  
  
"I don't know how girls do this," he muttered and than pulled the rubber band out of his hair and let it loose. Brushing it out he allowed the red waves to flow freely and thank the heavens for giving him his father's hair. He pulled out his mascara and fixed his lashes and put some gloss on his lips.  
  
Backing up he prepared himself for a new day. He made his way to the institute to live his double life, as his cousin Jean Grey.  
  
*** Cruised into a bar on the shore  
  
Her picture graced a grime on his door  
  
She a long lost love at first sight  
  
Baby, maybe you're wrong  
  
But you know it's all right - that's right ***  
  
*Jean had just come home for Christmas while John decided to sleep over to celebrate her home coming. Jean and John had always been close since they had been raised together and given the same gifts of telepathy and telekinesis. They were often known as the 'Twins' and called each other that as well.  
  
As children they would often switch up by pulling their long red hair back in a ponytail and plucking John's eyebrows, they'd go home with the wrong set of parents. They were two mischievous children. But that Christmas day their twin ness ended when Jean suddenly disappeared.  
  
They had all been seated around the dining room table while Jean's father said grace. Suddenly a fire arose in the turkey. Everyone screamed as the flaming turkey began to dance towards Jean. Suddenly it flung itself at her face and wouldn't let go. The fire around the turkey invaded her body and she was taken over and disappeared through the open window, flapping her wings. Everyone ran towards it.  
  
They sat back down with their heads in their hands, John cried. Jean's father and Mother decided to call the Professor to find out what to do.  
  
*** Back stage we're having the time Of our lives until somebody says 'Forgive me if I seem out of line' Then she whipped out a gun Tried to blow me away ***  
"Hello, Professor Xavier, a turkey took over Jean's body!" Mr. Grey called out. The Professor gasped. He immediately stood up from his chair and paced the room trying to figure out what to do.  
  
"This must not be found out, Scott would die!" He shouted and he truly didn't want to lose another gofer. "We must hide this from everyone."  
  
Both Mr. and Mrs. Grey turned to John who was twirling his long red hair around his finger and soon enough he found himself on a plane to Xavier's institute.  
  
*** Dude Looks Like A Lady Dude Looks Like A Lady Dude Looks Like A Lady Dude Looks Like A Lady ***  
He had great difficulty adjusting to it and had to learn how to be like Jean, so he behaved how he remembered her. That's when he started to like Scott. He had never felt so alive. He hadn't known the 'truth' about himself until meeting that boy. So he started to flirt with Scott, managing to get his attention away from the girl with the white hair.  
  
Life as Jean was great until he realized that he could never tell Scott who he really was. They had never passed first base, and probably never would in their lives.*  
  
*** So never judge a book by its cover Or who you gonna love by your lover Love put me wise to her love in disguise She had the body of a venus Lord, imagine my surprise ***  
John finally managed to get home and saw the Professor roll his chair towards him.  
  
"So how did the appointment go John," the Professor asked.  
  
"Fine, Scott had insisted coming with me but luckily I managed to get away," John said. They both laughed. Ororo entered the room and John raised his voice an octave.  
  
"Hello Jean, do you mind watching the children tonight? Scott has to study for a Spelling test, Rogue is behaving quite strangely and Logan had to go to the vet for some reason, something about a poodle." Jean gave her a bright smile.  
  
"Of course Storm, no problem," Jean said.  
  
*** (Baby let me follow you down) Let me take a peak dear (Baby let me follow you down) Do me, do me, do me all night (Baby let me follow you down) Turn the other cheek dear (Baby let me follow you down) Do me, do me, do me, sue me ***  
"Thank you child, well I'm off to my 'Goddess 'r' Us' meeting, I shall see you all later," Ororo said and strode off with a large cloth bag.  
  
"Well, I should get ready for the evening Professor, bye," John made his way to Jean's room but was held back by Scott.  
  
"How'd the appointment go?" Scott asked.  
  
*** What a funky lady Oh, she like it, like it, like it, like it Oh, he was a lady ***  
  
"Great, I'm fine," he gave her a warm kiss and they parted. Aww!  
  
*** Dude Looks Like A Lady Dude Looks Like A Lady Dude Looks Like A Lady Dude Looks Like A Lady  
  
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That was worst than Evan's, anyway the next one is Storm. Leave your thoughts in the reviews. Thanks :) plus I don't own the song or the characters 


	13. I'm hea to tell da fyucha!

Sorry for taking so long guys, I'll be updating this slower since I'm crossed between writers block and school. Yuck! I wanna thank you guys cause ur reviews make me a happy camper. I hope this chapter doesn't suck too much...anyway, if u got the time and u like drunk people and OC's read a fic called ROADTRIP! that me and three other people are writing. The authors name is Scitzyjadedcookiechaos, go ahead to the search button, ya know u want to. Anyway review guys, I hope to manage my time so my updates are faster...I say this in every chapter, school sux!  
  
Oh yeah and think Miss Cleo!  
  
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Ororo made a complete U-turn when she was far enough away from the institute and went to do her evening job. The money Xavier paid her wasn't enough to buy her more stylish floral print skirts and head bands, so she decided to take on an extra job.  
  
She arrived at the studio and got her make up done before settling in front of the camera, her blue eyes darted around nervously and she made sure that her accent was in check.  
  
"Okay Ororo, you're on in three, two, one!" the director said.  
  
The camera turned on and we find ourselves in front of an African woman wearing a brightly printed turban and dress. Before her was a crystal ball.  
  
"Allo everyone! I am miss 'Ro and I am in hea to tell da fyucha!" Loud clapping is heard from the studio. "Now all ya have ta do is call da numba flashin' on da screen and for a dolla fity a minute I tell ya what ya wanna know." A ringing sound is heard and Miss 'Ro speaks loudly to oblivion. "well hea is our first calla!"  
  
"Hello, ith thith Miss 'Ro?" a familiar voice asks.  
  
"Why yes chil', what be ya name?" she asks.  
  
"Um, well my name ith Logan," a dog barks in the background. "Quiet down poopthie! Anyway, and I'm an arieth."  
  
"Okay, well Logan, now what is ya questan?!"  
  
"Um, do you thee any love for me in the future, I'm feeling a lil lonely," he added.  
  
"Let me check my balls, chil'! Oh! Aheeeyawah! Eeweetunoki! Da fyucha is appearin'. My sources tell me dat love will knock on your door when ya least expect it!" Miss 'Ro says, and hides the New York Times under her table, the Horoscope section in clear view. "Next Calla!"  
  
"Hi dis is Arrnold Schwarrrzenegger not Piotr Rrrasputin aka Colossus from da Acolytes, I am a Taurres and I would like to know if I am to become da next president, or anithing of dat naycha?" He asked. Piotr checked to make sure the others where in their rooms sleeping, he heard some salsa coming from Remy's room.  
  
"Well let me see, rubbin' my balls, rubbin my balls! Ee deedle deedle dum! Cracka smacka smacka! I got it! No!"  
  
"Hitler! I shall burn down Caleefornya!" He says passionately.  
  
"dat's fine chil'," and then she hung up on him. "Who is my next calla?"  
  
"Hello, this is Xavier and I'm disabled, my legs were crushed under a meteor when Superman landed on earth. And I would like you to join my school for frea-I mean gifted youngsters," he said. Miss 'Ro looked around and shuddered nervously.  
  
"Um okay, send da info to my mailbox P.O. 20023 at Hollywood, Everest. Next calla!"  
  
"Hi! Mah name's Rogue and I'ma Pisces...No no! I'm a Sagittarius," she said. Miss 'Ro got confused. "Ah was wonderin' if there was any chance for a Hispanic man in mah future?" she asked.  
  
"Let me see chil'. Woeeeum woahum! Woeeeum woahum! Ah yes, I see sometin'! I see ya going into Belview Mental Hospital! Next!"  
  
"Ello Biddy, this is a young man in need of some Psychic influence."  
  
"What is ya sign?" Miss 'Ro asked, a little jealous at his accent.  
  
"Well luv, I'm a Scorpio. I'd like ta know if I'll ever have the chance with this girl named Wanda," the guy asks.  
  
"Da Crystal ball tells me dat she will find out da truth soon enough. Now da show is ova! My psychic friends can take da rest of ya calls, good night and tune in tomorrow!" Miss 'Ro said.  
  
Ororo changed into her regular clothes and made her way back to the institute. She parked in the garage and when she walked into the living saw a bald man doing back flips and yelling 'Whoopee!' but when she blinked Xavier came wheeling in.  
  
"I have good news Ororo, it seems that we now have a new mutant who will be joining us at the institute," he said. And Ororo smiled weakly. She made her way up to the room and cursed when right in front of Wolverine's door was a pile of poop.  
  
"Damn it, I told Logan to clean up after himself," and with that she left.  
  
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Not as amusing as I hoped...I'ma give up writing all together, no more fan fics for me! Anyway review and tell me I suck! 


	14. Tolansky, Todd Tolansky

**Long time no write, but let's see if I can work up something in my funny bone. Thank you all for your reviews, they mean so much to me and though I know you've disappeared, that doesn't mean you don't love me anymore! I don't own the song, Johnny Rivers does.**

****

* * *

****

  
  
He held the sniper in his hand firmly and pointed it at the first guards head. Pulling the trigger, the guard slumped on the ground, blood seeping through the hole. The young man did the same to the other guard and left the rifle by the door, entering the office.  
  
There the bad guy was, sitting in his chair, with his back towards him. He didn't swivel and spoke aloud.  
  
_There's a man who leads a life of danger  
  
To everyone he meets he stays a stranger  
  
With every move he makes another chance he takes  
  
Odds are he won't live to see tomorrow_  
  
"You've been trying to trail me for many years. It's time for you to tell me who you are," said a familiar voice. The young man pulled out a handgun and pointed it at the chair. He smiled and his yellow teeth glistened in the sunlight.  
  
"The name's Tolansky, Todd Tolansky," said...Toad. The chair swiveled and he found himself face to face with his arch nemesis, Dr. Evil. Todd unlatched the safety on his gun and shook his head, giving a sexy smile. Frau grabbed her bosom at the intensely sexy look, it made her toes curl.  
  
_Secret agent man, secret agent man  
  
They've given you a number and taken away your name_  
  
"Ah, so you, Mr. Tolansky, are the one who has been ruining my underground drug ring..."  
  
"What?" He asked. "I just came to get back the fifty bucks you owe me from last night's poker!"  
  
"We've been CAUGHT!" Frau shared with the others.  
  
"Well, I think Mr. Tolansky that you won't be receiving payment. You know too much! Get 'em fem bots!"  
  
_Beware of pretty faces that you find  
  
A pretty face can hide an evil mind  
  
Ah, be careful what you say  
  
Or you'll give yourself away  
  
Odds are you won't live to see tomorrow  
_  
The fem bots came through a door that no one noticed before and walked in; their ample bosoms growing cold...er, their barrels coming out so they'd be able to shoot at him. They began to shoot towards Todd but he back flipped out of the way and grabbed Mini Me by the neck. Holding a gun to his head, he threatened them all.  
  
"Call off the fem bots, Dr. Evil! Or I'll kill him!" he shouted. Dr. Evil called off the fem bots and they went back to the other room where they were busy, er, training with Number Two, ahem.  
  
_Secret agent man, secret agent man  
  
They've given you a number and taken away your name_  
  
"Don't kill him! It will cause me to yearn for death for fifteen minutes! Then I will attack you with this stapler!" Dr. Evil said. Frau made a move though and Tolansky shot her in the head. He then threw Mini Me out the window were he "eeped" all the way down and landed in Fred's huge bowl of Fettuccini Alfredo. "It's now over Tolansky!"  
  
Dr. Evil ran towards him but Todd leaped over his head and kicked him into an appropriately vacant machine which Dr. Evil pressed a button after sitting Mr. Bigglesworth in the seat beside him.  
  
"We'll return Todd Tolansky! And when we do, nothing will stop us!" He then shot through the ceiling and disappeared into the sky. The government received many calls of a pair of metal testicles floating through the air.  
  
_Swingin' on the Riviera one day  
  
And then layin' in the Bombay alley next day  
  
Oh no, you let the robber slip  
  
While kissing persuasive lips  
  
The odds are you won't live to see tomorrow_  
  
Todd then ran to the drug ring and killed all of the people involved before saving Eliza Dushku who was strapped into a chair. He freed her and leaned her back in his arms.  
  
"I have no idea who you are, but right now, I want to have sex with you on this table so you can then leave me with crabs," she said. And they had sex on the table but instead he left her with the gift of Herpes. And the day was saved, thanks to Todd Tolansky.  
  
_Secret agent man, secret agent man  
  
They've given you a number and taken away your name_  
  
Secret agent man  


* * *

**Not my fault this sucked, it's been a long time. But hopefully, I can get back in the mood.**


	15. Lil Victor and Friends

**Another day, another chapter. I don't own 'Tearin up my heart' by N Sync and I don't own Gio who cut my hair up to my shoulders. That man can do wonders!**

* * *

_It's tearin' up my heart when I'm with you  
And when we are apart I feel it too  
And no matter what I do I feel the pain  
With or without you_

Sabertooth was at the salon doing his hair while Gio trimmed it and gave him highlights.

"Whaths wrong Vicky?" Gio asked as he folded yet another bit of foil. Victor Creed a.k.a Sabertooth sighed heavily, mixing it with a growl. Gio giggled. "Etho a mi me guthsta." (I like that)

"Nothing, just thinking about my childhood," Sabertooth said. Gio flipped his long black hair over his shoulder and sighed along with him.

"Talk to me. Share your childhood."

"Well, it all began when I was seven..."

_**dream sequence**_

Logan and Sabertooth are sitting in a school yard. Logan looks like Logan except he has a butt tooth and big eyes with long eyelashes, his hair is straight. Sabertooth looks like Sabertooth, except he has pigtails and a snot drop that keeps getting sucked in and blow out every time he breathes. They were both sharing their lunch.

"Hey Logan. I have a qwestion," Victor said.

"_Gwowl, gwowl snarl_ Do you understand me?" Logan asked. Victor rolls his eyes.

"Let's pwactice our secwet code later. Anyway, you comin to my sweepover?"

"Yeah! I hope we pway 'pull the worm' with your gwampa again!"

"Yeah, we pway that evwy night!"

"You're so lucky."

"I know...so uh, I have a secwet Logan," Victor says. Logan's eyes go huge and forgets about popping the little bubble in Victor's nose.

"What Vicky?" Logan asked and leaned over. Victor batted his lashes and gave him a kiss on the cheek. Logan's eyes popped open and the flat hair on his head curled up on the ends. Logan ran off and Victor started to cry. His teacher came over and hugged him.

_Baby, I don't understand  
Just why we can't be lovers  
Things are getting out of hand  
Tryin' to much, but baby we can win  
Let it go, if you want me boy let me know  
I am down, on my knees  
I can't take it anymore_

"What's wrong Victor?"

"Fwom now on, I am no longer Victor, my name is Sabewtooth and I will not west until I kill he who bwoke my lil' heart! Gwowl! Gwowl!" Sabertooth shouted.

_It's tearin' up my heart when I'm with you  
And when we are apart I feel it too  
And no matter what I do I feel the pain  
With or without you_

_**Dream sequence ends**_

Gio is on the floor sobbing and Sabertooth hopes that they wash off the highlights before they turn orange.

"I'm stho sthorry Vicky. I didn't know things were that hard for you. I feel like punching Logan next week when he comes in for me to do a touch up on his roots," Gio said. ...That's why his hair rollths up...,Gio thought to himself.

"Well I better go...," he said and wrapped his hair before leaving. They kissed each other on the cheek and 'chaoed'. He rode his motorcycle towards the Institute and looked at the velvet pink curtains that indicated Logan's room.

"Growl...growl growl," he said and drove away. He didn't notice Logan looking out the window and with his super hearing, he heard Sabertooth's words.

_Baby don't misunderstand,  
What I'm trying to tell ya  
In the corner of my mind,  
Baby it feels like we're running out of time  
Let it go (go) if you want me boy let me know  
I am down on my knees, I can't take it anymore ohhhhh.._

"I love you to..." Logan replied.

_Tearin' up my heart and soul, when we're apart I feel it too  
And no matter what I do I'll feel the pain with or without you  
  
Tearin' up my heart and soul when we're apart I feel it too  
And no matter what I do I'll feel the pain with or without you_

_It's tearin' up my heart when I'm with you  
And when we are apart I feel it too  
And no matter what I do I feel the pain  
With or without you_

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**Did you like? Part credit goes to my bro. He helped me out on this one.**


End file.
